by Rosie | Apr 27, 2017 | Inspiration
The Gift of Life Welcomes guest blogger Jen Labriola sharing her story in with us during Infertility Awareness Week.
I’m one of the lucky ones to not only survive a troublesome pregnancy that resulted in premature twins born at 28 weeks but also enduring eight years of infertility. At face value, it seems I was dealt a bad hand along the lines of fertility. Coming from a family of accidental pregnancies, my Fertile Myrtle mother who with contraceptive onboard still got pregnant with me, you’d think I’d inherit that trait.
Nope! Infertility isn’t inherited, it just happens. Just like a premature baby, sometimes, things just happen. It’s how you deal with these little setbacks that define your success and outlook. As I dealt with my twins in the NICU, with positivity, I dealt with my infertility the same way.
I’m a veteran in infertility and have been through nearly every procedure. I’ve shoved needles into myself for IVF, I’ve curled my fingers around the edge of a table as the searing pain of yet another test to see what was going on in my uterus, and I’ve prayed hard after procedures. I would hold a straight face with bad news, and then bravely ask, “Okay, what’s next?” I’ve researched what 0% APR credit cards I could use to pay for the procedures because my insurance didn’t cover infertility. I’d spent enough money to buy two cars.
While many of my friends, who also are infertile, would quit, I decided I would do everything in my power to get pregnant and if after three IVF tries, I didn’t get pregnant, I would quit. So after my first real IVF, I couldn’t wait the two weeks and took a pregnancy test four days before my scheduled blood test at the IVF clinic. I took the pregnancy test that morning, it showed one lowly line (negative) and I tossed it in the trash. That same day, after work, I was complaining to my husband about how I’d never get pregnant and how much money we are wasting, in a fit, I dug the test from the garbage to show my husband. In that, I noticed a second line, a faint second positive line. I was pregnant.
So, to those who are going through infertility, my only advice is to be positive. I tried not to wallow in the negative, bad news. My first words after bad news were always, “what’s next?” I also researched everything, I read message boards, and I became my own expert in the field. Doctors, nurses and the like are not the end-all in what they say. In exchange, you must own your own journey. You must make the decisions, the ideas and not depend on the medical field wholly. This goes with anything medical; I did the same research for my troublesome pregnancy and NICU babies.
Positivity is what has always been and is my goal; I spoke in terms of when I’d get pregnant and not if I’d get pregnant. In terms of my troublesome pregnancy, I had to get to 28 weeks for my babies to be viable, so I told the doctor I’d get to 28 weeks, it was my goal, and it was everything. I was positive, even in the negative news, I followed my intuition. I just knew things would work out regardless of my doctor’s ideas on what could happen. Could is the key word here because no one knows what the outcome will be. So go by your gut feeling, you know deep inside the answers if you listen to your intuition.
So in this week of awareness, this epidemic of infertility that finally is coming out from behind the curtain, I am in the hopes that those putting up the good fight for infertility insurance coverage, for men’s infertility issues and a better understanding of this hugely growing need, continue to make traction. Those dealing with, succeeding or moving on from, infertility issues, it undoubtedly leaves a mark on your life. It’s up to you to make such an emotional experience as something that was part of your life or as something that has defined your life.
For me, this is my past; it’s not part of my definition of me anymore. My twins, my own determination, my own success is defined in the positivity of my future. Still, always optimistic, I am cheering for you, you the infertile, you the premature mother, and essentially you.
Thank you, Jen, for sharing your story with The Gift of Life. Jen is a graphics artist and dedicates her time to the Gift of Life doing graphics and being a preemie mentor to other preemie moms!
Visit Jen’s profile https://thegiftoflife27.org/preemie-mentors/
The Gift of Life
by Rosie | Apr 24, 2017 | Inspiration
The Gift of Life supports premature babies and their parents through the NICU journey, but what happens when you can’t conceive?
The Gift of Life Welcomes guest blogger Rinat Halon sharing her story in with us during Infertility Awareness Week.
“I recently interviewed a client to create a Photo Marketing Strategy for her business. I asked her, “What is the most incredible experience you’ve ever had?” After a long pause, she said, “I have a hard time answering that because the most incredible experience I’ve ever had was giving birth to my children, but I know you cannot have children, so it’s very hard to share with you.” I thanked her for caring and showing empathy, but I asked her to go ahead and share this truly incredible experience with me anyway.
My life has been divided into 2 parts; before I knew I could not have children and after. As a teenager and young woman, my life plan was to get married and have two children; specifically, a boy named Jonathan and a girl named Natalie. Not too many people know this, but I quit my Walt Disney Imagineer in-house photographer job not just because of shifts in our department, but really because I was ready to make my dream a reality and become a mother. I wanted to raise my children and be a stay-at-home mom. I had decided that the best way to do that was to work from home as a photographer.
This dream came to a complete stop the day I was diagnosed with early menopause at age 34 years young as my ex-husband and I were trying to conceive. My life changed forever. As you can imagine, this diagnosis took a toll not just on my health, but on my life and emotional being. At 35, I was divorced, dealing with a complex and rare medical condition, which I had to figure out how to treat, and I still needed to make a living as a photographer. Photographing weddings. And maternity. And newborns. As my grandfather used to say: Oy yoy yoy, roughly translated as “oh dear God.”
Soon after being diagnosed with early menopause, it took all I had to get through these portrait sessions of pregnant moms and newborns. After the beautifully glowing pregnant women left my studio, I would cry as I was editing their photographs. Photographing newborns ironically sent me into the fetal position on the floor crying my eyes out, it was too much.
Ten years later, I am, first of all, healthy. In the 10 years that passed since that moment I got the call that changed my life, I have been lucky enough (and stubborn enough) to change my life for the better and make the best of it–-as it is. On this journey, I was fortunate to be so loved that I was able to heal from the pain and do what I do best: Turn the pain into an opportunity. The opportunity to capture the cycle of life through my portrait clients. After 18 years of photographing professionally, I know now photography is more than my profession and passion. It is my calling.
Today, one-third of my photography business revenue comes from maternity and newborn clients. The thing is I realized that there is a gift in this pain of not being able to have children and facing a beautiful newborn from behind my camera. It is the gift of living what you don’t have through capturing the beauty of it for others. Being part of the experience of welcoming a new life into this world–literally, over and over and over again–creates peace in my heart. And seeing my clients’ eyes well up with joyful tears as they look through the proofs from their maternity or newborn session, I know in my heart that it is not just that I am receiving the gift of this experience from my clients, but also that I am able to give them a gift: the gift of the energy of all my unfulfilled hopes and dreams to become a mother. I can’t explain it in words, but I know that this energy brings so much love into the portraits I am creating for my clients that it shows in the photographs.
A friend who just gave birth to her second child called me this morning to share the birth experience with me. We cried together, tears of pain and joy combined. “If I could give you anything from motherhood,” she said to me “it is the joy of that moment of seeing your baby for the first time.”
After we said goodbye, I walked into my studio’s sales room, where I have photographs of my clients hanging as samples for other clients to see. Michael, Cathy and David’s newborn’s sample photo was sitting on the chair waiting for me to hang it. I looked up and saw all of my other clients’ maternity and baby pictures I have hanging on the walls and felt the love surrounding me. Sometimes, things don’t work out the way we plan it, yet life, in all of its miraculous glory, always finds a way.”
To see some of Rinat’s maternity, newborn, family, and wedding portraits go to rinathalon.com
If you want more information about early menopause, I have created a facebook page with resources I found that helped me through my healing journey. CLICK HERE for more info.
Guest Blogger: Rinat Halon
Contact The Gift of Life for support: www.thegiftoflife27.org
by admin | Feb 26, 2017 | Birthdays, Fatherhood, Holidays, Inspiration, Parenting
Here at The Gift of Life we’ve established a tradition of celebrating birthdays by dedicating a blog post to the celebrant. Birthdays are extremely important occasions to us because their very meaning touches so close to home when home is what we’re all about; too many preemies don’t get to celebrate even turning one year old.
So we take a lot of joy when someone we know and love gets to celebrate another year of life. Today, we’d like to send out a very happy birthday greeting to our own Marcus Moore, co-founder of The Gift of Life.
Now Marcus is a special kind of guy, indeed. When his son Kaleb was born a preemie and needed special at-home care, Marcus stepped up and left his career to stay at home and take care of his newborn son.
Life is so precious that not one moment ought to be taken for granted, and Marcus realized this. Kaleb had defied the odds when he lived despite warnings from medical experts who said he wasn’t going to make it. And the sad fact is that a lot of preemies who have this prediction placed over them by doctors indeed perish, even if they survive a few years.
Marcus took it upon himself to oversee his son’s well-being firsthand. It’s rare to hear of a stay-at-home dad, but considering what it takes to take care of a preemie, Marcus took the position of stay-at-home dad to a whole other level – it’s what he wanted to do and it’s what had to be done.
And we can see the results of Marcus’ love and care for his preemie son. We have a living witness that serves as the evidence of this man’s prayers come true – Kaleb himself, who just so happened to have turned a whopping 7 years old last year.
In a world where broken homes and general brokenness is not uncommon men like Marcus Moore are of particular noteworthiness. No way would we at The Gift of Life let the day go by without extending to him our well wishes for Marcus’ birthday.
Happy Birthday Marcus Moore! You too are a gift of life.
Want to join in on the birthday celebration? Consider making a donation to The Gift of Life.
by Elisa | Dec 22, 2016 | Birthdays, Inspiration, Rosie Moore
Some people go all about for their birthday, buying themselves expensive gifts and expecting others in the life to do the same. Funds aside, there are people of all ages, walks of life, and status levels who consider their birthdays to be all about them and insist, even take great pleasure, in celebrating them as such – there’s nothing wrong with that, right?
It’s true that there are those who don’t celebrate birthdays at all, rather for religious reasons or lack thereof. At The Gift of Life, birthdays are extremely important, not due to some philosophical reason, but because of the condition in which some enter the world, namely preemies. For a preemie to survive that first year is a big deal because that baby had a high chance of not making it even that far in life. So, when his or her birthday comes, it’s celebration time, regardless.
But what about those who arrive in the world fully formed? Life is still worth celebrating. Much like the high level of wonder and interest that is given in the lives of those who have longevity and make it beyond 100 years of age, each year is precious and counts. That life has its ups and downs through the years, that people make mistakes, is irrelevant here; the value of a person is gestalt – greater than the sum of his or her parts. Every person has the right to celebrate the years they survive, one at a time. How do you celebrate yours?
Today, December 22nd, is our founder’s birthday. Happy birthday Rosie! We love you! And Rosie does enjoy celebrating her birthday, indeed…
Being the mom of a preemie son as well as the leader of an organization that cares for the families of preemies, understanding the value of life and of surviving the years comes to Rosie effortlessly and gracefully. For her, the celebration of her birthday is not just about herself, but of life. All human life.
On your next birthday, consider celebrating it by doing good for someone else. Make your birthday celebration not about you and experience the great reward from so doing. For Rosie’s birthday, we ask that you join us in celebrating it the way she loves to do; giving to the preemie cause and community – make a donation to The Gift of Life. Even the smallest amount counts.
